Feeling Stuck in Life – What You Need to Hear
Maybe you’ve been here for a week. Maybe it’s been a couple months. Or, maybe you can’t remember the last time you weren’t feeling stuck in life. You’re in the right place, and it’s time to snap out of it — even if that means hearing what you don’t want to hear…
Feeling stuck in life is your fault.
It’s okay. You can click out of this post if you want to. That just means you’re not ready to hear this yet, so I hope you’ll come back to it one day when you are.
Yes, maybe something happened to you — we can’t disregard that. But what was it? What exactly happened that knocked you so far off course that you’re now here telling yourself that you’re “stuck” ?
Did you lose someone?
Did you get fired?
Maybe you were sick?
You’re allowed to feel the pain of those experiences, so don’t ever allow anyone to tell you differently. Part of being alive is having emotions, and grief —without a doubt—is one of the most important emotions to feel.
Grief is one of the most important emotions to feel.
Why?
Because grief changes you.
It shakes you.
It can rock your reality and make you feel like you don’t know your purpose in this world anymore.
So, why is feeling stuck in life my fault then?
Because to be “stuck” is to stop moving. You have chosen to stop moving.
Keyword here: chosen.
We choose where we linger in life. We choose what we get hung up on. We choose what we allow to fuck us up.
Something has happened in your life that you have allowed to stop your progression. And if there is one thing human beings need in order to feel successful and fulfilled, it’s progression!
If there’s one thing human beings need in order to feel successful and fulfilled, it’s progression.
Everything in this world progresses.
Plants grow.
People age.
Prices are constantly rising.
The Earth spins on.
Feeling stuck in life means you have allowed yourself to stop progressing in the direction you want to go.
You might feel defensive over this statement and think something like,
“Hey! I haven’t stopped progressing. I still go to work and exercise and see my family and walk my dog.”
Awesome. But are you progressing on your goal? On your deep-down-inside kind of hopes and dreams? I’m guessing you’re not.
Because otherwise, you wouldn’t be here reading a blog about what to do when you’re feeling stuck.
I can name three periods in my entire life when I have felt stuck:
After five years of an on-again-off-again relationship, I started to feel myself falling out of love with this person. I knew I wasn’t emotionally chasing him anymore, but I didn’t know if I was ready to let him go yet.
I felt stuck in the relationship because I was afraid of what it would feel like to finally be without him.
After recovering from bulimia and latching on to diet trends like keto and intermittent fasting, I didn’t even recognize my body anymore. I’d gone from being 110 pounds to 150, and I knew deep-down that I still had a terrible relationship with food and exercise.
I felt stuck in my own body because I’d treated it so badly for years, and now it wasn’t listening to me.
I’d just landed a job I never thought I’d get: marketing manager for an international nutrition supplements company. Every day when I showed up to work, I felt anxiety and imposter syndrome because I never thought I belonged there. Deep, deep down, I knew it wasn’t what I wanted to do with my life.
I felt stuck in my job because, truthfully, I don’t think I ever really wanted a “job.”
Pay attention to the wording here: I felt stuck because I…
You are stuck because of a decision that you have made.
That person who broke your heart is not keeping you stuck.
The job you got (or didn’t get) isn’t keeping you stuck.
The illness or injury or depression is not keeping you stuck.
You are — because you’ve allowed self-limiting beliefs to scare you away from getting back in there!
Feeling stuck in life: what you need to do
Here’s how you’re going to get un-stuck. I’m going to give you three steps to help you stop feeling stuck in your situation. And I promise you that if you follow these steps, you will see your shit changing.
1. Own your shit
You will never become the version of you that you want to be if you don’t take responsibility for yourself. What does that mean?
It means that you need to start changing the language in your head about why you are the way you are.
We all make life choices every single day, and you can either choose to change or you can choose to stay the same.
If you’re this far in the blog, I’m going to assume you want to change. So, here’s what you need to do:
Every time you even think the words “I have to” or “I can’t” — change that to “I choose.”
| I can’t get off the couch today | I’m choosing to stay on the couch today |
| I have to stay with him | I’m choosing to stay in this relationship |
| I can’t make more money | I’m choosing to not pursue more money-making opportunities |
2. Write down your Top 3
Most people have more than one goal in life, and these tend to revolve around three subject matters:
- Wealth
- Health
- Relationships
If you’ve got more categories — perfect! But to make this doable for you every day, we’ll focus on these three.
Grab a pen and a notepad (seriously, go grab one right NOW!) and write down three goals you have for yourself in these three areas. I’ll give you my examples:
- I want to be making over $10,000 per month by the end of 2023.
- I want to feel the most physically capable that I’ve ever been on my 30th birthday.
- I want to prioritize personal time with my partner every day, so we ensure that our professional relationship does not become the most important one.
Write down yours.
Make a repeat alarm
Open up your phone right now (I’m betting it’s right next to you) and set an alarm to go off every day. Call it something like “Check in” or “Progress Check”
It doesn’t matter if you choose morning or afternoon, but I would recommend NOT scheduling it in the evening because most people don’t “start” their days after 5pm.
Every day, when this alarm goes off, you need to ask yourself:
“What am I going to do today that will get me even one step closer to this goal?”
It can be as small as sending some e-mails, rolling out the yoga mat, and asking your partner to have a date night-style dinner with you tonight.
Seriously — I’m not asking you to shoot for the moon here. I’m telling you to start, and then keep that momentum going.
Remember, it doesn’t matter what steps or directions anyone gives you. The responsibility of changing your life is completely on you.
So, get moving. Start right now.
Congratulations. You are not stuck anymore.
If you enjoyed this post, you’ll probably really like this one: How to know when it’s time to give up on your business.
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